Embrace Your Niceness...

Posted by on June 15, 2015 at 5:10 PM


I have some lovely female friends who would probably give me the shirt off their backs if I asked them to. It’s a wonderful feeling to know this, yet I find myself warning them against being too nice ; that they need to pull back and not appear as a ‘pushover’ to their friends and family.


Much of the time, I sometimes feel that they’re being “too nice” about easily enabling others.

I must warn my friends of successful strategies, making sure they don’t burn out or become push-over’s. It’s all about the use of healthy boundaries for when, how and whom they help, and protecting their energy more carefully, focusing on what will have the greatest impact. I’ve also found that  it hwlpa by using empathy to open doors that meet others’ needs, without sacrificing their own. Then, they muat learn to advocate for others by employing a win-win strategy. They will also need to remember to keep their own interests at bay.


On the one hand, the concept of givers, takers and matchers actually allows givers the advantage of creating a flow with the support they offer others. While doing this, givers often widen their sphere of friendships and create ‘good karma’, with its tendency to cycle back.

Sharing and giving with others shows strength.  I ask my friends to do a little victory dance by embracing their authentic “niceness” as I also let them know that their way is the kind and right way to be.

Tools with Heart hosts classes for seniors ,in Women Growing Older Gracefully group workshops.  We redefine the aging process to challenge traditional approaches to aging and host discussions by asking seniors to create wiser choices about their wellness. We introduce important tools for improving the quality of life,  becoming more optimistic and motivated.  

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